Workplace Romance Hits New Low

John Reid
Monday, February 12th

Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

Are you ready for Valentine's Day this week. It's. You are thinking about some buying some flowers or some chocolates and now. Romance singer seducing or at least propositioning somebody who you work with you might want to think twice about that if you. If you haven't heard the news there are some months. There's some liabilities and that potentially especially if the romance goes badly. Cut down the road doctor Harland diamond is a workplace expert and the president and diamond associates. And she joins us now with some startling news. Then off office romance is really hit a ten year low this year. It says that it says they had. I mean there are a lot of people I know who have met the love of their life's work you know toiling side by side next to that person. And that's where they learned about each other and they you know things kind of worked out. Four of them are also innocent people but things went really badly and they each and. And and that's the problem letting today's climate where. Sexual harassment means they beat the founder and every rocket fuel well. I just. Think can lead to be overly cautious. I ER I think this meet too movement has done a world of good I mean it's incredibly important that now. Women will feel safe young girls in particular field facing. Coming forward with somebody's. Attempting to do something inappropriate to them. And we opened that door wide open but the other side of that is. This and we sell it Caribbean now that are basically it's seeing everything is inappropriate. And so dating is it's pretty tricky it's always been pretty tricky. Because you know the social studies need to have both social skills in terms of I you asked but also the social clues or emotional intelligence. In no way you being refused. Ryan you remember that skit on Saturday Night Live where. They have. Kind of a nerdy image I I hate to be read about a nerdy kind of unattractive guy hitting on the woman at the office trying to get her to go out on a date. And then the very attractive athletic guy can pretty much do whatever he wants and the same woman Joseph. It is a little love. She's getting the attention. And you know not I saw that I felt like that's kind of the way global the world is not just work. This could have wanted are unwarranted. What do you remember DSL are here in Silicon Valley where I had a guy named Richard wade walked Farley did this big Rambo thing and. China prevention people. Believe I think ever call us. That's what exactly what you talking about this guy who is I can't you know people who knew him I personally involved in the case. Somehow peripheral that do a lot of people but he was alert he has no social skills. He was a lovely woman she didn't wanna insulting to a safe. So. Still DOD wasn't picking up the right clues. And I won't be going to the whole story but here at silicon valley's they are fairly common that people just have not developed. They're kind. That's social politically you know Lin went to a fully went back from. And so I haven't even needed that cost and then the other thing of course is one of the things that come forward with all of this need to look at. Is the fact that people in positions of power take advantage is taking advantage of those that is subordinate to them. So I think that most companies are creating you know absolute rules that you cannot date somebody that is your subordinate the early period. So it's it's completely new telling companies sent thousands of employees is so it gives you you know people from other departments. Yeah before the you know for our company that it could face some sort of liability that makes complete sense to say if you have. A direct supervisory role or you are in senior management. And someone could try to take advantage of view or just that the power dynamic is so different that there it's it's impossible. That if it works out and the inferior person stave her. And makes it took several one place. I think that goes pretty led many plays serve very long time not necessarily garnered. But I can. Okay. What do you do advise a company for an individual. What would you say would be the sub rules under that one if if that's the premier rule. I would say no flirting with. And this is not at this time today I say this gently by the way because I'd love flirting and I love you know that kind of anxious but that. That it didn't you know it is time to be much more professional much more conservative. That. No flirting no dating and if you really really crazy to have somebody or massive amount it'll wind. Possibly even to light. But take no for an answer to take you got now mortuary here in meaning no. Is we women have learned had to do these you know you can mistake it's kind of superficial things. But they all mean though and it is an absolute yes that means now. Is it appropriate take it you know I try to be. Nice to people and I have called myself on several occasions thinking gosh in the said that you know some local men and they looks fantastic. And a same. You know love your dress or you're look you look amazing today are you going out tonight. And I think good deals and after awhile let's figure out that I'm not hitting on them but I thought in my head. I just opened myself up to a bad but potentially bad situation. And we didn't say that John is because it's also been used as a weapon. There have been situations that I know of where a woman wells for the first time beef instead of the you know the big shots making a presentation and just wish he's stand up some guy's gonna make some more how do you look today. It'll bring her. And it throws that are completely. Of course and it embarrasses your mixed terrier kind of stuttering. Floundered. And that's. Cut its slide no compliments. Plus the fact. Committed I mean give her demands they go another image he looked terrific there like you to sit. I don't know that I've heard that I've heard people I've heard straight guys who have said to others straight guys. Are you working out you've lost some way we will go it's okay but. But yeah and if it did we find there's a line that people don't cross and you'd be you'd get in trouble personally he crossed a grind. Yeah and tell it what we're saying is you know is down credit satellite these. And right now I'm just storing them lying about it anymore conservatives. Place today than they normally would because I'm concerned we blood due process. Well that makes sense that you know all you have to do is raise the complaint and who companies will. Understandably be very harsh in their assessment of the situation potentially at least so I appreciate you coming on the program in Ghana. I'm reminding us of some parameters especially as we head into. Valentine's and we know that everybody's. Got that on their mind says doctor Arlene diamond. President Daimon associates thanks so much for joining us here and giving us some good advice on Richmond's morning news.